By popular demand, my losing submissions to the Late Show with David Letterman Top Ten Contest for the week of April 16. This week, there's a good reason none of my entries will be selected. They all suck.
Top Ten Little-Known Facts About American Idol's Sanjaya
10. Prefers to go by his middle name, “Kenny”.
9. Thought he was auditioning for “American Chopper”.
8. Plans to continue his fight to gain worldwide acceptance of the faux-hawk.
7. Has ugly fights with his sister when she uses his Panteen Shimmer #5.
6. Didn’t really like "Shrek the Third".
5. Would stay up for hours voting for himself.
4. Owns two turntables and a microphone.
3. Possesses the gift of understanding everything that Paula Abdul says.
2. He loves Ding-Dongs. (But who doesn't?)
1. He’s not a strong singer.
Do people on the west coast just watch taped episodes, or do they do the show over again later for those markets?